Shocking Tell All

Part II of the Tattler's Two-Part Librarian Expose

The investigation continues. A second librarian agreed to talk.

Last month, the Tattler questioned Steve, a 17-year library veteran who claimed nothing could shock him. We tested that claim, uncovered questionable bookmark practices, and learned that he enjoys deciding which books must leave the collection.

This month, Lacey agreed to talk. We wanted to know whether they shared their colleague’s opinions and what else might be happening behind the desk at Monroe Street Library.

It didn’t take long to discover that Lacey has standards.

Arrange your books by color and Lacey will concede that the result may be attractive, but considers it “an aesthetically pleasing organizational nightmare.” Lacey prefers hardcovers, and their feelings about dog-earing depend on scale. One or two pages are not ideal. Dog-ear half the book and you should “expect a polite email from me.”

Lacey takes bookmarks seriously, matching them to each book’s cover design, theme or subject. Lacey’s mother, who also works in a library, shares the habit and has an impressive collection.

Not everyone approaches bookmark selection with the same care.

“What hasn’t been returned in a library book?” Lacey asked. Credit cards, driver’s licenses, family photos, children’s artwork and dirty tissues have all made appearances.

Some of Lacey’s favorite work happens behind the scenes. Each week, staff receives a “missing report” of books that should be on the shelves but aren’t. Tracking them down becomes “a combination scavenger hunt and mystery.”

“It’s extremely satisfying to actually find a missing book!”

Finding books, however, is not the same as deciding which ones should stay.

Lacey’s least favorite task is weeding the collection, deciding which older books must go to make room for new ones. Condition, circulation statistics and similar available titles all factor into the decision.

This presented an unexpected development. Last month, Steve identified collection management as one of his favorite responsibilities.

Two librarians. One collection. Very different feelings about thinning it.

Fortunately, there’s more to library work than deciding which books get to stay. Lacey particularly enjoys helping people discover something new.

“I love when people ask for recommendations!” Lacey said. Just give Lacey five minutes to think and check some resources rather than expecting a suggestion on demand.

Lacey is equally enthusiastic about the record collection. Music “just sounds better on vinyl,” they say, and the format encourages people to slow down and listen. The library even lends record players.

And if Madison Public Library doesn’t have something, staff can request it from another library system. They can’t obtain everything, but Lacey says they can get most items.

For all Lacey’s particular feelings about books and their proper management, the favorite part of the job is the people.

Lacey describes Monroe Street patrons as “curious and creative,” and loves seeing children discover the next book in a favorite series or simply enjoy the toys.

“Laughter in the library always brightens my day.”

After two months of questioning, a consistent picture has emerged. Two librarians with different opinions, different favorite tasks, and the same unmistakable affection for their neighborhood library.

Which left one final matter.

Is a hot dog a sandwich?

Lacey’s answer was considerably less final than Steve’s.

“I think a hotdog is more sandwich-adjacent, but by definition I suppose one could rightfully classify a hot dog as a sandwich, though I wouldn’t call it one myself.”

The library remains without consensus.